All I wanted to

Dream goes on

I had the sweetest dream ever yesterday that I barely wouldn't want to wake up :D

I feel young!

Lol!

This is life

Bonjour! I've abandoned my blog since decade years ago. Seriously!
Still wondering how time brought me here and now still alive typing this post in my blog. I feel awesome to write on my blog again. Thanks god for giving me the chance to enjoy what I have now.
So here's my life, briefly written,

2014 November I passed my LJM and college final. I graduated and officially became a state resistered nurse. Should be proud as I gone through this tough years.

2015 January-  I started my working life. Getting to know I've been chosen to work in my current department 5A. Well,my feelings when I heard the news, I'm shocked + unexpected + disappointed cause I wanted to work in the psychiatric ward. But I have to accept the fact. After some time, I'm used to the environment. Starting to build relationships with my colleagues.So that's why I'm still there. While I've gone through honeymoon, the so-called crisis but however I learnt my way to survive. Working for living is never easy. Finally I understand the meaning of this sentence. Since the day I'm paid with my salary, I realised there's a lot of things I need to consider because it all relates to money. Life had never been easy since I started my working life. I'm stressed out sometimes. Not only due to my work, but also relationship problems. Starting to bring my personal emotions to work and it really affects my performance. And now I'm diagnosed with depression. I'm currently undergoing treatment . I believed I can be back to my happy life like I used to have before someday. I'm glad to have my loved ones to be with me, supporting me and take care of me. Right now I just want to be happy.

All about Nursing

I'm having my clinical practice in Ward 5B for about 2 weeks. Seriously,I'm facing a lot of stress. I had problem with my colleagues,problem with my work by making mistakes,and problem of doing assignments. That's why stress is overwhelming me. As a nurse,I spend all my time monitoring others health.

But what happens when my work responsibilities get in the way of my ability to maintain my own health and well-being? We bath patients, we fulfill patients hygenic needs by helping them on passing urine and motion, we clean the toilet too,we serve food and we feed them, we monitored their health for 24 hours, we cannot defense when we get insults. This is Nursing.  

Psychologically and physically, I'm really tired of being a nurse. 

I never do well in anything. People complain of pain when I give injections,people complaint that I'm forgetful, there's so many complaints that I can't even finish listing it out. Am I really suitable to this career? I think of giving out everytime,but what can I do? I'm bond with the contract for 8 years. And if I quit,what else can I do? 

Goodbye to Chinese New Year; Hello to college life 

:(

The one-week-holiday for Chinese New Year just ended like that! It's Saturday already and I am going back to my college tomorrow. Guess I'll be in jail again :'(
 It's going to be bored starting next week,exam sake. I'm going to have my exam on 9th of Feb which will be approaching in about 1 week time. Seriously, I couldn't off my CNY mood yet. How on earth could I study? It's hard to accelerate myself back into times that I do not wish to have. I'm still stuck on holidays. I started to cry every time I think of going back. I know I shouldn't behave like a little girl in fact I'm a big girl now. But it's hard to control my emotions when it's time to leave home. I felt depression surrounding me again. Being with family is the best thing ever.

I'm awaiting for the next return.  

Happy Chinese New Year - Reunion Dinner

It's Chinese New Year Eve!
I'm waiting so long for this day. I'm looking forward to eat reunion dinner together with my beloved family. Family members who are away from home will make it back in time for the occasion. It is the time for everyone to catch up with each other. This is an important part of the Chinese traditions that helps keep the family bonded. 

But everything seems to changed after we grew elder. Not everyone had the thinking of eating together with family, some prefer to eat with friends or some does not want to eat the so-called 'reunion' dinner at all. Everyone has their own way of perception. Well for me, I take reunion dinner important as this resembles UNITY in a family.

I don't take seriously of this reunion dinner till I realize family are the only one I can rely on. Ever since I left home to further my studies,I seldom stay at home. I really miss home when I was there. I've been always thinking about going home everyday. I think those who left their home will had the same kind of feeling as I had, because home will be always welcoming us. Remember when I am small, those days were just innocent and pure. When coming to Chinese New Year, my sisters & brother get extremely excited till we stayed up all night just to welcome Chinese New Year. We really had a lot of fun gathering together celebrating this event.

I miss those days of us celebrating joyfully together. I wished time could rewind, so I can feel those joys again. But will it be possible? The long-awaited Chinese New Year suddenly became a trauma to me.